I had the best of intentions last week. Well intentions don't always equal results....I got my monthly early...which is absolutely NO EXCUSE, but it throws me off enough to make room for old patterns to sneak in. Once that happens my fears creep in....fears of success, failure, who I will be without the weight...etc....
The good news is that I am able to recognize the sabotage shortly into it now. What I mean is...a couple of days into it I am able to step back and ask myself what am I doing. Stop and regroup!
What is causing my self destruction you ask....well I think what triggered it was the weight of 230....I have not been in my 220's for at least six years or so....despite many attempts...so for whatever craziness my mind turns to....I don't believe I can do it....how crazy is that?
I know, I know...that is just a line that my brain holds onto....I think the idea of having the life I have always wanted freaks me out. Why....I don't know....maybe because I am afraid I won't have the comfort of my weight struggle....comfort of my weight struggle....I know you are saying....WHATTTTT?????....it is true...I know who I am when I weigh this weight. I use it as an excuse to stop going for my dreams. "If I was thin I would...."
I am doing my best to push through this and continue on with my success. I cannot thank SWEAT enough for all they have done for me. It is because of them that I am able to move forward....You guys are the best!!!
I was up 6 tenths of a pound this week....how frustrating!!! This week will be better!!
If you are having struggles please know that you are not alone and there is someone out there that can relate to you!!! Lean into a place of support. If you do not have someone to turn to please, please consider looking at SWEAT...there are all different kinds of ways you can participate. They will change your life...if you just let them!!
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Okay Carrie, I appreciate your honesty because that is what it will take to know how to get the focus back...it is time to make a HUGE step...are you ready for it? You have to be...remember the deal and let's go for it. Don't think so much and just keep the momentum gonig...keep yourself busy...take a walk when you find yourself getting bored and thinking too much...I want you down this week for sure! No excuse...break past the line....let's go! Keep me posted and YOU ARE SO WORTH IT!
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