Today was an excellent day!!!

Well I went for my final measurements and I was very proud of my results!! Here are the final numbers....

Starting weight 259 today's weight 226

Total loss - 33 pounds
Total inches lost - 27"
Body fat reduction - 13.1%

These results are amazing!!! I want to thank SWEAT again for everything they have done for me!!! I wouldn't have been so successful without them!

Now to focus on the next 12 weeks. My goal is to weigh 199 by June 30th. Another 27" would be nice! The most important focus still needs to be the body fat content. I would like to be at 29% by June 30th.

Have a terrific day!!

Back on track...

This is the end of my eleventh week....that is amazing to me!! The normal human needs approximately 21-30 to change a habit....well....that has never been true for me concerning my weight issues. I still cannot say that I have changed myself when it comes to working out. I think it is going to take a few more months to solidify my new activities.

There has been a shift for me in the past few days. I am seeing that my consistency in exercising is really keeping me focused. I have talked about this before, but it is so apparent to me how much my commitment to SWEAT has kept me on track. I have been working out with Josh this week. I am not so afraid of him any longer. I am learning that I can do the workouts and that my body is adjusting to the changes. Josh's workouts are killers, but I can tell a big difference every time I go back in. Don't get me wrong....everyone at SWEAT gives you a killer workout!! Josh just has an incredible sense of intensity that adds that extra 10% to everything you do. That is a bit scary at first, but once you are able to physically push through it....it is quite amazing what you can accomplish!

I can't wait to see what the next 11 weeks will bring. I am thinking that I will have even more results than the first. I am able to push myself harder and I am getting stronger all the time. Getting started was definitely the hardest part...

Sabotage, sabotage, sabotage...

I had the best of intentions last week. Well intentions don't always equal results....I got my monthly early...which is absolutely NO EXCUSE, but it throws me off enough to make room for old patterns to sneak in. Once that happens my fears creep in....fears of success, failure, who I will be without the weight...etc....

The good news is that I am able to recognize the sabotage shortly into it now. What I mean is...a couple of days into it I am able to step back and ask myself what am I doing. Stop and regroup!

What is causing my self destruction you ask....well I think what triggered it was the weight of 230....I have not been in my 220's for at least six years or so....despite many attempts...so for whatever craziness my mind turns to....I don't believe I can do it....how crazy is that?

I know, I know...that is just a line that my brain holds onto....I think the idea of having the life I have always wanted freaks me out. Why....I don't know....maybe because I am afraid I won't have the comfort of my weight struggle....comfort of my weight struggle....I know you are saying....WHATTTTT?????....it is true...I know who I am when I weigh this weight. I use it as an excuse to stop going for my dreams. "If I was thin I would...."

I am doing my best to push through this and continue on with my success. I cannot thank SWEAT enough for all they have done for me. It is because of them that I am able to move forward....You guys are the best!!!

I was up 6 tenths of a pound this week....how frustrating!!! This week will be better!!

If you are having struggles please know that you are not alone and there is someone out there that can relate to you!!! Lean into a place of support. If you do not have someone to turn to please, please consider looking at SWEAT...there are all different kinds of ways you can participate. They will change your life...if you just let them!!

Small changes mean the world...

It is fun to see the small changes that are occurring. I went to the community center to do an extra hour of cardio on Saturday....it was really interesting to me....I was one of only a couple people that were actually sweating while working out. There were about 20 people in there, but my intensity level was probably one of the highest. That is due to my training at SWEAT. I love them....don't get me wrong...I still hate the workouts, but I love them.

A couple things really surprised me...every time my heart rate fell under 130 I felt as if I was slacking. What is the point of being there spending my precious time working out if I am going to waste it. That was huge....before SWEAT I felt that a heart rate of 120 was high.

The other thing that surprised me was that I had two minutes left....I thought would cool down...then I thought what a waste...I can cool down walking to the car....wow that was new!!

After I got home something really big hit me....for the first time EVER I did not even think about the stairs going up to the second level at the community center...in the past whenever I have gone to workout I have always had the thought that I would like to take the elevator, but I couldn't be that much of a weak effort!! :-)

Don't get me wrong...I am still the last at boot camp, the slowest at the gym, BUT....I am making progress and that is what counts. I am only working to be my personal best...the exciting thing is that my personal best keeps getting better!!

Have a terrific day!!

Another 2 pounds!!

Well bootcamp went great this morning....it is such a great workout....it is nice to see everyone else struggling to get through, while I am suffering.... :-)

I lost another 2 pounds which puts my total at 29.... Yeah!!! I weighed 230 this morning....my goal this week is to skip the 20's altogether!! I have really been struggling with food so I believe that if I really buckle down with the shakes this week and add the hour of cardio (which I haven't done yet....) that I will have a terrific weight loss next week.

This weekend will be a time for Dayna and I to catch up on things we have been wanting to do, but haven't had the time....this is a weekend with no "HAVE-TOs" just "WANT-TOs"....that is nice for a change....

I hope everyone is doing well!!!

Feeling better this morning...

Well I am feeling better this morning. It is a half day for Ellie, so we will have a fun afternoon!

Ellie and I are going to participate in Emma's Run. This is an annual event in Anthem that is scheduled for April 4th. We are going to do the 5K walk/run. I am hoping to mostly run...Ellie is excited to train with me to do this in a month. We are going to drive a mile and begin working with that distance. I promised her that we will work on it every weekday.

Out of the blue Ellie said, "Mom, do you remember last year when someone tried to hand you a flyer on Emma's run and you said no thank you? Well look how far you have come!" It was nice to know that she is seeing the changes in me!!

Everything just backed up on me today!!

This past year has been one of the hardest in my life. I have a wonderful husband and two healthy children, so I definitely keep things in perspective. I am very, very blessed and I thank God everyday for everything that surrounds me.....

When I started writing this blog I promised to be as transparent as possible...so I will keep my promise. During this past year I have left a career of 25 years in the mortgage industry. I completed (closed) my company last July. This was not my first choice, but I truly felt as if I was left with no other option. That made it very difficult. I have had to deal with the feelings of failure and disappointment since that has happened. I know that I cannot control the global economy, but I think that I am supposed to be "Super Woman".

Well the loss of the business, lead to bankruptcy in an attempt to save our home. We have been there for seven years and it was the only home Dayna and I shared as a couple. We went thru a year of not knowing if we would be able to stay, if we would make it until Christmas, if we would be able to keep all of our dear pets.....The pressure I felt was unbearable. Nothing was coming together for me....Finally in January we had to make the tough decision that we were unable to keep our home.

Since then we have found a wonderful home to rent, an amazing landlord that allowed our pets to come with us and we are still in my daughter's school district. It has been a truly blessed couple of months. Does that make is easy or proud to leave our home....absolutely not.

Well over the last three weeks I have really been through the gamut of emotions. I was sick, preparing for the move. We downsized from about 2500 square feet to about 1400 square feet, so that meant sorting, selling, organizing and letting go. There has been a huge part of this process that has been very freeing. I love our new smaller home. It truly is a new beginning for our family. I have kept the best possible attitude thru this time, but today it all tumbled in on me. Yesterday I was over at the old house doing some more clean out for the donation truck on Wednesday. I woke up this morning feeling very depressed. I didn't want to get out of bed. I couldn't stop crying and I didn't want to go anywhere. Well.....

I had a workout scheduled at SWEAT for 1:00....well obviously I didn't want to go....

I did go, a little late, but I made it. I fought back tears the entire workout, sometimes not very successfully. Gina was great...she gave me space, but still worked me out hard. I really had an awh-ha moment today....I realized that at this point I cannot always control my food intake....I know that sounds like a cop out, but it is the truth. I am able to be a little more aware while I am eating to satisfy emotions....and I stop sooner than in the past. Over time I know that I will not turn to food, but that is definitely a process. BUT HERE IS THE KEY...As long as I continue working out I know I will be successful...

The SWEAT Team has made it possible for me to have a place to go where people really care about my success. The connection I have made with the trainers is amazing. I know I matter to them, not just because I am a number, but because they are helping me change my life!! Thanks to all of you for that!!!!

Thanks to my wonderful husband Dayna who could see that I needed to be done with the old house and took over the task of the final clean up and move out of all of the last items. He is such a gift and I love him very much!